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If it were that weird and unusual, then I would not have to worry about my best buddy and chum. He and his child would be celebrities, well recompensed by the media and advertisers, (between his grueling rounds of interviews and campaign appearances) and well-tended to by the medical and scientific communities (between his grueling rounds of exams and experimental tests). Other than being a prisoner, his free soul would have been free of burdens we common and usual folk must endure." "No, what happened left so little evidence of its cosmic intervention that, if I were not there when it happened, I myself would not believe it! No body will be able to believe it!" "Well... okay, one "no body" figured it out. But Zelda Gilroy is hardly among us common and usual folk. Mentally and physically, she belongs to a category by herself. (If only she would remain there.)" "No, the fact that my oldest and dearest friend is, as far as this materialistic, seeing-is-believing,. Some of you think your wife is too plain, too skinny or too ugly for me. Wrong again. Those mousy little bitches that no one looks twice at in the supermarket really get me going.They're also a hell of a lot easier to get. Here's lesson number one. A lot of you guys wondered during your divorce why your wife gave you all of that bullshit about how she didn't feel beautiful anymore or how she felt old. This confused the shit out of you, didn't it? You told the bitch you loved her every fucking day, didn't you? And you often told her she was beautiful too.Guess what? It didn't matter. For some strange reason women think that their husbands are supposed to tell them that shit. So after a while, it no longer registers. You can tell her she's pretty twenty times a day and it'll go in one ear and out the other. I tell her once and she's mine for the taking.When she's in the super market reaching for a gallon of milk and she looks up and sees me and I say, "Damn, you're hot." Her pussy just.
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